Hanging Around

*sigh* I have a cold and cannot talk right now. If I were to try it wouldn't be pretty for anyone directly involved. So here I sit typing and if need be, whispering to whomever comes around.

Someone or someTHING has to be trying to give me some sort of signal. I move into a new apartment and it is almost completely renovated beforehand. It feels GREAT to be moving into such a new place. Of course the one thing I take note of as I enter into my new new abode is how wonderously PINK the tiles in the front entrance and bathroom are. Those tiles are not replacement for old finish. I have to admit they are in good shape, which would stand to reason why he did not deem it necessary to change them. However............................ PINK?!?!? What is it telling me!!!

Now that I've been on site for approximately a month, I can give a bit of comparison to the age old question "Which do you prefer, shop or site?". I'm only going to compare it because for me there is no better. Shop is warm in the winter and our shop is relatively cool(A/C), in the summer. That is ALWAYS a plus. Site is cold in the winter and can be a sweatbox in the summer. That is NEVER a plus. I find that site work goes more quickly than shop work. Shope work is repetitive, whereas site work always seems to have some sort of twist to it that either makes it impossible to hang a certain piece without chopping another trades balls off, or maybe just because it's raining and I have to weld anyway. There is never a shortage of stress in either location. Mike seems to enjoy his position and handles it quit well from my perspective anyway. Ed hates his position and never let's the opportunity to point that fact out pass him by :D . Although in all honesty he seems to be handling his situation quite well as well, so as much as you hate it Ed, your doing great!!! Ok that had nothing to do with comparisons for my oppinion, I just felt like going off on a tangent. So where were we.......... ah yes. Site will require much more clothing come the colder months, which keeps me from freezing to death, but also can keep me from getting into that perfect position to get that piece welded. Meh, will just have to try to get at it from a different angle. In shop I left my tools on the work bench I inhabited most often. On site everything has to be locked up or it WILL walk away. I put down a pair of safety glasses for three hours in the middle of a high traffic area and don't they walk away!!!! It's not like I asked for it by leaving them there or anything. LOL. There you have it. A few comparisons, but no real oppinion yet. I'm glad I am on site now, but I'd be ok in shop as well.

I got a chance to hang out near the ceiling for a whole day two weeks ago. I'm telling you the feeling of love when Ed sent me up onto that ladder to hammer drill some holes into the ceiling was overwhelming indeed!! Getting up there and then having to balance myself on the third rung from the top, reach up over me and use one of the heavier drills to vibrate my body into fear of falling, was awesome!! I'm such a lucky girl!!! Well if asked I will do it again. How else
am I going to battle this uncertainty I have in my ability to find my center and BALANCE! I've also done a bit of welding on a ladder and that I can handle. When I'm looking through a mask and the only thing I can see is the arc, I have less sense of my surroundings and don't feel the height. Monday I get to climb on top of a piece of duct hanging from the ceiling so that I can weld it together. Now THAT should be interesting!! Do wish me luck!

Welder to be........ Or not to be.............

Welder to be... or not to be...
I'm closer now to the end of my first year as an apprentice than to the shakey beginning. I can't think of any machine in the shop that I haven't used except the plasma, which I'm not seeing in my near future, but I won't discount it yet. With everything I've done over the past year, one thing still stands in the forefront for a better future... money. I'm looking forward to that 10% raise come November!!
When I first started in the trade, my goal was to start welding. I had no idea how long it would take to get to that point. It was a matter of either learning it in school first, or personal opportunity. Well personal opportunity won out first. Andrew is my first "teacher" when it comes to welding and he has made it possible for me to build enough courage to take what I've learned to work. I have now been welding in shop for over a week. I am definitely pumped about the whole thing!! I still don't know a lot of technical terms as far as the whole process and materials go, but this I know I will learn as time goes on. At least I have my foot in the door and am on my way! I do however hope to stay in shop welding until I am confident in my work, and I will save on site welding (ie. hanging upside down by my toes while bending backward and welding) for better days. :D
Last night was the Union (Local 47's) 100th Anniversary!! In representation of the event all the members got a watch with the unions logo in the middle. Andrew is beyond stoked about the watches (mine included since they ordered female style watches for the women in the trade), and I was definitely proud to wear mine! They are quite something. I went to the event with Rebecca, Andrew and his date Tanya. We sat at a table with four others. Nathan and his girlfriend (don't recall her name, horrible horrible memory... BAD!!). Nathan works at Dilfo with me and also is showing an interest in welding, but don't get too sure of yourself Nathan! I'M shop welder!!!! hehehe. Brian and his girlfriend (don't recall her name either... my brain should be shot, it's lame....) Brian did work for Dilfo some time back during his apprenticeship, but has since moved on to other work. I think the big shocker for everyone invloved was that I wore a skirt! It wasn't my first choice, but there you have it. Not only a skirt, but HEELS!!! Yikes, what will the neighbours say now!! I have a pic of Andrew and myself taken at the dinner and I tower over short stuff quit a bit LOL! I had a great time. I have definitely come to realize that I know enough people in the trade now to stop, schmooze with and feel perfectly comfortable. Mind you many of them were more than half cut and feeling no pain by the time I stopped to say hi, but that's ok, I only took a few embarrassing future blackmail pics, not many.....
:D

NOW you can shit an eggroll!!

I've discovered quite recently, though I've had inklings all along, that I would make a rather content nomadic Native living in a time with no airoplanes or boats on rough water... along with large boats on trailers. Although now that I've long since discovered video games, it's almost worth the risks we humans put on ourselves with the things we create. Poor Andrew has had to deal with a lot this past weekend. My daughter and I went with him up to his camper this past weekend. Friday went without any hitches, and then Saturday we made the attempt to get his pontoon boat out of a receding lake and onto his trailer. The whole process took us between 1.5-2 hours. That is one heavy boat and when it settles off the rollers, it SETTLES!! I think that boat was giving us attitude for not taking it out for a spin in a few weeks. After all the messing around we dealt with, the trailer came out of the water with a flat. So we had to teeter totter the boat to the nearest town for an air pump. We ended up in Smith Falls, which was farther than he had hoped to go. We then spent a wonderful afternoon on Otter lake motoring around and swimming. It was great! The water was warm and Tammie was having a blast!

The sun came up Sunday morning bright and warm. Birds were singing, and I could swear I heard an angel playing a harp. It couldn't have been more cozy. We got packed up and headed back to town a bit early. Figuring we'd have a bit of extra time to do whatever we had to before Tammie and I took off to our family reunion. Everything and everyone bundled into the truck, the boat attached to said truck and we were a shoo-in. I think Andrew must have hiccuped because at one point near the beginning of the journey the truck went a bit right sending the trailer tire onto the shoulder and starting what would be my prozak induced medical dependency for life! (honest!). It was a bit stubborn on returning to paved road which according to Andrew made him "pucker" some. So everytime the truck even seemed to glance (yes trucks in my world can glance...) to the right I'd go all tense. Andrew kept looking at me and telling me to calm down. I couldn't help it, it's in my nature to not want the white man and his ways pressed upon me (in this case that would be sitting in a truck pulling a VERY heavy boat). So we pull into the city and I start to breath. I actually forget all about the boat until the pot hole in the intersection of Fallowfield and Greenbank enters our lives never to be forgotten. In retrospect I don't actually think those were Angels playing harps... I think it was more along the lines of our deathmarch being played out... yes I'm a drama queen.... Well as soon as we hit that pot hole that was it for the trailers axel. Off went half the axel and the left wheel across the road and down went the boat. We heard a BANG, Andrew looked into the review mirror saying we hit the intersection light and then as he watched the boat fall to the left he says (so much calmer than I would have given him credit for considering we were watching his hard work go down) "NOW you can shit and eggroll!" Tammie told us later that she was zoned out and all she really remembers is looking up and seeing us both looking behind us with looks of horror on our faces. Poor girl.

Andrew assessed the situation and then with no other alternative he got back in the truck and dragged the trailer and boat 200 feet to the shoulder and out of the way of traffic. I'm impressed because my big worry with the boat was if it leaned too much it would fall over and take us in the truck with it. What actually happened, is the wheel fell off but the boat didn't come off the trailer at all AND didn't take us with it. Quite impressed, but I'm sorry it took that sort of damage to build my confidence in it's sturdiness. Well Andrew got right back on the horse, called a friend to come help and got the trailer off the ground, welded and back in working order within 3 hours (yeah Andrew!!). We ended up leaving early to get ready for the reunion, but I checked in on him a bit later and all was looking healthy once again. HHaaaaaahhhhhhhhh (sigh....)

Monapolis Times

I think I've forgotten how to do anything else but insulate TDF duct work......... Pitsburgh? what's that................. Ok maybe it's not that bad, but I'm sure Trev and I are the going experts on rigid insulation. Goodness knows I could tell you how it grits between the teeth compared to flex.

I'm thinking our rags must come from someone's home, because they aren't store bought cloth or anything. They are actually ripped up pieces of someone's clothing. Well this week a piece of someone's old pink fleece jogging pants ended up as our cloth at the insulation table. Pink fleece jogging pants............. think about that for a second.......... pink.......... fleece.......... getting any mental images? Jogging pants.................. is it coming to you? Or are you having trouble, because those three things don't belong in the same sentence. Who wears PINK pants in the first place (no Andrew they are not pink they are SALMON or more like a rusty red....), let alone fleece jogging pants. I was looking around the shop trying to picture who's home this monstrosity came from. Picturing the guys I work with walking around with wives wearing something out of the 80s. Or even some of the women that work up front owning a pair. Gave me something to chuckle about while slicing through mile upon mile of insulation. Are you with me here? Or am I alone on this one...

So I asked Danny (big bosses son, future big boss) about my book. We have these books that throughout the apprenticeship have to be signed by someone when we've accomplished a task. At the end of the apprenticeship it has to be I believe 75% full. Our union is for both tinbangers and roofers, so I don't see myself filling out any sections that have anything to do with roofing, but as long as I can get the rest of it filled out, I'm good. I didn't know when I should start concering myself with that though, so I was a big girl and asked! You have to understand this is a big feat for me due to my life long partnership with shyness. It took me awhile to see our forman in a casual light. What's that all about anyway? In my mind I KNOW he's a nice guy, as is everyone out there (well most anyway......), so why would someone have trouble making the first move to get to know that person. Pooey on shyness, I spit at thee!!!! So I asked and it turns out that if I leave or finish my apprenticeship, whichever happens at Dilfo first, they will then go through the book and sign off on all the necessary areas. He DID however say that most people finish their apprenticeships once started at Dilfo, which made me feel REALLY good. I would love nothing better than to stick with Dilfo throughout my apprenticeship and beyond if possible!

I've started biking to work! It's actually quite satisfying. I enjoy it. At the end of the day I can definitely feel it in my thighs though. Rock hard legs coming up! Yay health!! Hopefully this added with good eating will put off anything my high cholesterol started on my heart up until now. Breath easy!

Me? A health nut?

Ok so we're going to try something new here. I've decided to work on areas of my health that my rigorous job doesn't touch. I definitely get a good workout standing all day, as well as in my arms with all the lifting and hammering that I do. However this does not touch my middle or other areas that could use a bit of toning up. As of last week I started in on my jogging again. (Have you ever seen the movie "What Women Want" with Mel Gibson? In that movie he, or should I say Helen Hunt, came up with a shoe commercial. In that commercial they mention how therapeutic running is. How the road is there for you everytime, yada yada yada. Well that commercial couldn't have said it any better. I was feeling a bit down lately and so I went for a run. That run has now become determination.) Along with my jogging there is my kickboxing. Now my Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays are kickboxing days, and my Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays are jogging days. I've cut out a lot of crap in my diet (I even walked into McD's and ordered something for my daughter and didn't order anything for myself.... now THAT'S restraint!) I haven't had a pepsi in over a week now........... I KNOW!!! I'm also working on getting my bike in working order this week so that I can hopefully start taking it to work next week. This may seem a bit sudden and over the top, but this is my personal goal right now. I want this for myself. Not only will it help get me in better shape for some of the more vigorous work I'll experience, but it will also help me personally in so many ways. Health is never something that should be a passing phase. So GO LISA GO!!

I believe that I am going for my basic training this January at work. It will be a two month full time course load at I'm hoping Algonquin. We may be moving our classes to Oakville, but I'm hoping that when that is implemented, I'll have finished my intermediate if not my advanced courses. I won't put too many eggs in that basket though. One can only hope for the best. I'm a bit excited about going though (to the classes, not Oakville). It will be interesting what I can pick up. I'm learning so much, but there is SO much more to soak in!

Yes, it truly was embarrasing....

So at lunch one day at work I had put my head down to rest my eyes (honest!) and I ended up falling asleep. When I awoke everyone was leaving the lunch room except these two electricians that have been revamping the shop for the new plasma coming in. So The last tinbanger walks out the door, I'm thinking oh shit, time to go. I stand up take a step just as I catch the bad end of virtigo and lose my balance. I swing around to try and catch myself and end up doing a 180 into the fridge, which is about two feet behind where i originated! I stop, lean on the fridge to catch my barings and the two electricians are just sitting there taking in the show. Never try to act like you weren't really sleeping and then get up too fast when your still not sure which way is up. That was seriously the most embarrasing thing to happen to me at work! Right, back to work, bring on the power tools!!
This year is the tinbanging unions 100th anniversary. So they are having a dinner and dance in November I believe. At first I wasn't going to go. I am getting to know others, but not sure well enough yet to sit among a room full of them. I'm still a bit shy I guess. Andrew is going however, so he talked me into going as well. Let's see how social I can be! Now to find a date!
I am also going to play some golf with Dilfo this August. I guess I am getting out there a bit more. I thought of getting onto the union baseball team, but I think I'll wait until next year when I'm a bit more established. (was that an excuse?......)
I went to Toronto a few weeks back to check out the Pride parade. Didn't make it to the parade however. I was expecting it to be around noon or something and it didn't start until 2pm, so we had to start our way back to Ottawa by then. It's ok though, there's always next year and we did have a blast with my sister. We checked out the zoo (that place goes on forever!) on Saturday. That evening we headed over to friends of Carolyn's and wow she is cute when she's buzzed! Being the mature adults that we are, Carolyn, Tammie and I raced Greg and Den home. We called a cab, and they were going to take the trolly... streetcar? Note: I did say "going to take". End Note. We showed up home and about five minutes later they pull up in a cab! Not that they had a chance anyway, lol. So Sunday morning we went for some Dim Sum and Tammie actually ate something! Yay for trying something new beebs!! After that we chatted and then headed back to Ottawa. So I had a great weekend, and it was good to see my sister. We'll be out there again at the end of August for a visit and a trip to the CNE (get the barf bag ready!)

Summer is Among Us

Good news!! Andrew is finally on the home stretch of his pontoon boat!! That is so awesome. I'm proud of you man!! Getting all that done with everything else that has been going on! Par-ty time!! Hmmm well maybe we should wait until the homestretch has been completed before I get ahead of myself.......

It's official! I work in an oven. I can't be sure, but word in the heat box was that the air conditioner WAS on on Thursday... I repeat it supposedly WAS on!! I think we all felt like we had just gone for a swim in a pool of sweat by the time the day was done. I'm so glad I don't get B.O. easily, hahahaha "heyyy why are you standing way over there......"

Ok this whole facebook things is a bit creepy, yet addicting in the very same moment! I've been in communication with people that I haven't said "boo" to in centuries. Yikes... I can use that term... I'm old.... So here I am wandering through messages and networks and running into friends from elementary school. Although, I have also run into a few co-workers which has been sweet! So let's not say creepy... how about erie (is that more positive while giving the wow impression?) This is what I call getting reaquainted with the world and making new friends!

We made it to the Pow Wow yesterday. Was quite hot, but I had fun. Invited my friend Denis along and it was cool to see the pow wow through a fresh pair of eyes. I'm not 100% up on my culture, but I explained what I could. I think the occasion would have been better if we had brought some chairs (my bad!!), but I think we had a good time. Tammie brought her friend Sydney with as well and they had more fun running around playing hide and seek! Tammie got her fix of Indian Taco as well. Tried some fresh squeezed lemonade that tasted great! Not so bitter. I ran into a few people I know, but the highlight was running into Shoshona and Sky! I used to watch Sky back when I worked for the Friendship Centres day home agency. Tammie, Sky and Josh were all around 2 at the time. So to see him at around 11 now was amazing. They still live in Barrie, so when my friend Tammy moves there, I'll have twice the reason to visit! I'd love to find Sheila and Josh again. So overall it was great! Ended off the day with a bbq YUMMY! You can cook Den!

May flowers bring more bee's!! :S

Wow, I guess it's time for an update eh? Left you all hanging about that supposed union strike we may or may not have almost had? Yeah, I know... your all on the edge of your seats about it. So was I!! Well May 1st has come and gone, and we are still all at work. The beginning of this month was the new date of our new contract. It wasn't even all that much of a close call, though if you heard all the guys talking you'd have thought we were striking for sure. I guess the brain cells that control speach and the one's that control writing are at opposite ends of the brain. I of course know nothing about what is considered a "good" move for the contractors and what is bad. All I know is more money is ALWAYS good, and less money is always a bad thing. Well it wasn't a huge raise, but it will do. We're still at 36hrs. a week, so in another three years they will be battleing the hopes of bringing us up to 40 again I'm sure. I say it would mean more money, but as I've said, the typing side of my brain could also be different from my speach side, so get me in front of a bunch of union brothers/sisters and you may not get the same answer... shhhh *wink**wink*

Well I was beginning to believe that I was experiencing some heavy anxiety for a bit there. So I went to seek out a professional oppinion and found out today that I have low iron and high cholestoral. 34 yrs. old and high cholestoral..... I think I'll write McD's a letter and let them know it's time to move their restaurant across the street to a new location. It's inconveniencing me now!! Ok ok... yes, it is time for me to start taking fat out of my diet, and adding something better for me to fill that void. In actuality we don't eat all that much McD's, but we do tend to venture over to the Swiss Chalet side a bit too much. Move aWAY from the quarter chicken Lisa, slowely.....

In the hopes of adding to my new healthy regime, ie. getting into better shape, building self confidence, a sense of my own security and a bit of discipline, I have joined the Therien Kickboxing team! Wow does it feel good to kick someone! So far I've taken two one on one class with a coach and one group class. It is quite the workout, but wow does it feel good! The only thing I can compare it to as far as making me feel revived, is after a nice sweatlodge, though that probably doesn't make it any clearer to the majority of you out there, lol. So now I am a three to four days a week kickboxing gal.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day, so I wish all you mom's out there a happy, sunny (I hope), relaxing mother's day!!!

Day of Realizations!

I have a big head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wouldn't use the term huge, big is discomforting enough. Everytime I go to use the drop saw I have to extend the shield strap to fit around my melon. What's THAT all about! I don't think I look unproportioned..... Well I'll just chalk it up to my extreme intelligence, both in the right and left hemisphere of my brain. I'm both artistic and can do the math, hehe.

My foreman is human after all! He's a very serious looking fellow and so whenever I went to him for a new job I was always rather formal. Last week when he was showing me how to work the hole punch machine he said something casually personal for the first time and I was a bit surprised. Usually when he wants something done for a rush order and he starts working next to me I start getting nervous and usually end up trying to pace myself with him. Not a very relaxed atmosphere. This week he was cutting insulation while I glued it down and he was humming, and muttering to himself like everyone else. He held up a piece of insulation that looked like a big fish and stood it next to himself and yelled over to Claude to take a picture, while he stood there posing with his "fish". It was hilarious, and I realized he IS human! Isn't it wierd how that happens?

My daughter is becoming a different person. She is definitely not a little girl anymore! She talks about getting a job, asking when she is allowed to go to the mall on her own, she isn't as shy as she once was. She's even gone on a few sleepovers this year! (I think that is harder on me than her, but STILL!) :S She is growing up!! I'm so glad that we are close. So far she still tells me everything (or is that just me being naive....), and if something is troubling her she get's angry and doesn't just walk away and shut her door on me. I like talking things out even if we both get a bit upset. Much better to communicate than hold it in, this I know. Well she's heading into early teens, so hopefully we'll hit it head on and be able to fight our way through it successfully. Have a blast and remain close! The apple of my eye!!!

Major update!!

It's wierd... I realized today that I'm so used to getting scrapes and bruises from working with metal, that I don't even really notice when I get them at home. There was a time that the drama that would directly follow a paper cut was worth an oscar I'm sure! Just now I was cutting up strawberries with a pearing knife and jabbed my finger. Didn't break the skin or anything, but the ease at which I took the prick was interesting.

Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder- Inhibited sexual desire (ISD), sometimes called frigidity, sexual aversion, sexual apathy or hypoactive sexual desire. There is a study happening right now that anyone who feels they fit into this catagory can be a part of. They are testing for a drug to battle this disorder. Is this then the female version of viagra? What is normal in the homosapien world? We are striving to become so perfect that if you sneeze a slightly off shade of green mucus, you'd be thought of as plague ridden. There is a term for just about every function considered abnormal to society. We can't get over excited about our world without being considered ADD or is it ADHD now? There is no dancing spontaniously in the rain. That will get you a quick trip to the RO and I'm sure a multitude of pills to curb that urge again. (which reminds me of a story from my past... I was waiting for a bus in Vancouvers skid row one fine evening, pacing across the sidewalk from the street to the building I was in front of and back again. It was a boredom thing, nothing more. As I peacefully paced, a man came up to me and smiled at me quite knowingly as if we shared a deep secret and said "Yes, us crazy people have to stick together". So pacing... denotes insanity... Well it was a beautiful clear evening anyway, even to one such as I with my cracked mind.) If your born with a slightly more or less sexual drive you've got a disorder. We are setting ourselves up to become so dainty and ready to stuff different tablets into our system at the smallest whim of something not right about our physical structure that we'll have to be sure to get those AI robots in working order tout suit, because we will be too mesmerize with our perfection and too breakable i'm sure, to actually live our lives. Yes my french spelling is just as bad as my english spelling.

So we are in negotiations at work now. Time to renew our contract for the next three years. I have discovered that I cannot schmooze among a room full of men. I walked into the hall we rented for our vote to strike meeting and lost my voice. I just stood there watching everyone (ALL male) shake hands and talk trade. I could not come up with a single intelligent thing to say to even those I knew. How sad is that? I think I have a disorder... hyposhyness. So it is official! I am now a signed member of the Sheet Metal Workers Union. Of course I had to be in order to vote, but we'll bypass the obvious and move along to the excitement! So here I am working in a predominately male field, but loveing it! I'm sure I'll get comfy around the man factor and have them all under my thumb eventually! I have faith in myself!! My cryptonite has made it's way through my impenitrable wall of insulation that lines my nose and throat. Not sure how it happened, or what bit of cilia is responsible for letting me down, but I had a horrible cold a few weeks back. First since I started work there actually. I figured it was due to everything I breath in there. My own personal health plan floating in the air, wow they think of everything!!!

My bank card was compromised! It was exposed and made vulnerable by another! For shame!!! The SCANDAL! Well actually the bank won't tell me who they believe marred my innocent cards reputation! So it was cut into tiny pieces and I got a new one. Note to self... [use td bank machine and cash more often, less debit!!!]

It's alllll good!

I am so amazed at how much muscle I've gotten over the last four months. I mean my biceps are HARD. You should feel them. Maybe arm wrestle me! I'm pretty solid. Hey take a shot at me, go on I can take it. I'm the new She-Ra but without her sword of protection. Who needs a sword of protection when they're built like me!! Come on take a sho-

*ten minutes later*

Ok ok... I wasn't ready for that one. Give it to me again, I can take it. I'm a POWERHOUSE!! Try aga-

Life's Little Lessons

One thing I have gotten out of my experiences as a tinbanger, is confidence. Having finished a day of hard work gives me pride in myself. Being somewhere unwork related and feeling like I can take on different challenges I wouldn't have thought possible before, is rewarding in a different way. I find myself less concerned with whether I can do something and find that more often I am trying to figure out the best way to do it. Of course there are exceptions to everything (last weekends skating attempt being one), but I'm of a mind to know it is something I can always try again when I feel ready. Dangle a beavertail in front of me on a stick and throw skates on me and I'll end up from one end of the canal to the other!! I think that doing something that not many females have done gives me a sense of major accomplishment. Yes I'm tired by the end of the day, but I did everything expected of me, and I did it without any hangups. I think everyone should try something they wouldn't normally do and see how good it makes you feel after your done. See how it changes your outlook on everything around you. There isn't anything you can't do!

On this day I am feeling very proud of my sister Pepsi (nickname). She has had a rough road to travel over the years and she is doing quite well in spite of it all right now. She and her Bue as she calls him have been together for quite some time now and they have two wonderful children together plus her daughter from her previous relationship. He is wonderful to all of them, and they seem very settled and happy. Just given what I know of her and her past, I just wanted to mention how happy I am that she is doing so well.

Anger Management

I think there comes a time when everyone has these little revelations. They suddenly see something about themselves that either they want to eradicate because they've suddenly realized how abhorrent a trait it was, or they want to emphasize it more because it is something that could be that much more delightful. You see the situation for what it has always been, even if it didn't seem that way to you at the time. You come to the point where you either have to change it, or it will drive you nuts.
I’ve come to realize through many blatant attempts by others to make obvious, that I have an anger issue. The funny thing about that is when I was growing up I was probably one of the most patient people out there. There was not a lot that could really piss me off. Although I’m sure if you asked my mom she'd comment on how "quiet" I’d get even when things were tense. These days it doesn't seem to take much too really set me off. For instance, this evening I threw a load of laundry into the wash and proceeded to forget about it. When I remembered it was there and went to check on it, it had been removed from the wash and placed on the dryer. There was a new load both in the dryer and in the wash. I was seriously bent out of shape over that. a) reasonably so, I was angry with myself for forgetting my wash in the first place, and b) unreasonably, I was pissed that someone took my clothes out of the wash and when I missed the opportunity to slide my clothes in after their first load was done, but before the second made it into the dryer I was livid. Does it make sense? I don't think so. This evening my daughter told me that I’m scary when I get angry. I had no idea that others felt that way. Now mind you I’m not always angry and when it comes to certain things I am still very patient, but underneath all that there is this hot coal that won't go out. The thing that really got me thinking about it though is I see it in my daughter. The other day she got angry at me for something and I thought it was trivial to get so upset over something like that. Then a few days later I did the exact same thing to Bek. In all honesty it worries me to think I am passing something like that on to my daughter. She doesn't need to start off life with that attitude and I don't think it is really fare to her. This is the point where it has to either change, or drive me nuts. There of course are things I get upset about and I have a solid basis for those feelings, but it's these quick snippets that I need to curb and get under control.
ahhh to be human....

Pan's Labyrinth

Watching Pan's Labyrinth has brought back all my feelings on how affective foreign films are. With my interests leaning far more to the fantasy side, I wasn't sure how I'd feel about the movie having so much reality in it. Of course the story wouldn't have been a story at all without it, and I loved how well they blended fantasy with reality while at the same time managing to keep them in their seperate worlds. I personally find foreign films are a lot more emotional. There is a feeling of gritty reality that pulls you into the story more. There aren't a lot of cliche's and they seem so much more fresh. This movie being no exception. I was sympathizing with the girl from the start and rooting for her to get out of the reality she was living and find her dream. Definitely a movie for my collection!!

Official YET?!?

TAMMIE AND SIERRA
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I've finally finished my probation and I still have my job (guess they really DO like me... ). As of Monday January 23rd I have been an employee of the sheet metal workers union for 3 months. More specifically Dilfo Mechanical, and I hope I stay with them throughout my apprenticeship. I am now awaiting the MCA to get a hold of me so that we can get this business of a contract over with. Then I'll officially be an apprentice! Now honestly did you think I'd make it this far? I should watch what I say though. Might jinx myself in some way....

bek is moving into the building tomorrow. Am looking forward to having a friend close by. Back in 1999 I lived in the same building as a friend as well and we survived it. We both then and now are/where single mom's so there are a lot of things we can do to help each other out when so close. On the same note, we DO have a floor and two dead bolt doors between us if we feel we need them, lol. Also next September Tammie will have a little companion to go to school with. I'm sure Sierra will love having Tammie by her side more.

My brother was in a car accident last weekend. I believe they hit black ice and ended up totalling the truck they were in. He was wearing his seatbelt and his friend was not. They both walked away from the accident physically sound, but badly shaken up. Having something like that happen gives you a different perspective on life. I'm thankful my brother is here to tell the tale.

Wonder Woman!!!!

Ok so it turns out I'm not the powerhouse I thought I was. I am however quite confident that in no time I will reach maximum overdrive and get my superhero status and begin saving the world, one commercial building at a time. I went out to site last week and we had to unload a truck full of garbage shoots. They were in pieces between 4' and I'd say 10'. I helped get the first piece off the truck and went to grab it to carry it to the designated spot and realized I didn't have a good hold on it for the terrain we were about to traverse. So I put my end down to regrab and ended up unknowingly passing the piece on to Carl. Mario and Carl picked the piece up like tissue paper and off they went. Ok that is an exaggeration on my part, but compared to how useless I felt at that moment it very well should have been tissue paper in my mind. So on the way back to the shop I thought about how much further in body strength I really need to go. It was an awakening. THAT'S IT I QUIT!!!!

Ha, almost got you didn't I? Well you don't get rid of me that easily. All it means is... I've now had the heads up on part of what I have to look forward to and will have the opportunitly now to prepare for it. ie gain some serious muscle mass!! (and no, not like in the pic....... lol)

So I was going through the day with different things on my mind. I had at this point been left on my own for well over an hour to finish up the insulating I was doing. As I was going through calculations in my mind, I started thinking about different things and once again caught myself singing a phrase of a song out loud like a broken record. Believe me, I'm not the only broken record in that shop! I am however the only one who doesn't tend to sing at the top of my lungs.... So there I was singing the same verse over and then I started talking to myself about the calculations I was doing. Always easier to think out loud I say. 7 duct, 2 pieces per duct, 46" in height, and 10"x14" in length and width..... so I need 14 pieces cut on the 47" insulation... blah blah blah.... man is it hot in here... blah blah blah... wow does Mike ever mutter a lot to himself when he's working.... blah blah blah.... glad I'm not a mutterer.... (lol)

Claude is very good to me. When he is doing something new, he takes the time to show me what it is he's doing and what the end product will be used for. Of course sometimes when he's explaining these things he goes off into calculations I have yet to understand, but I am patient and just very glad that he is taking the time to inform me. It's always good to have someone take a true interest in your learning process.

As I finished up the insulation I realized I must have gone through a quarter of a roll of toilette paper. Insulation makes my nose go nuts. What I need is a hanky. Like the one my grandpa Maloney used to carry around in his back pocket. Some dark coloured bandanna that I can pull out throughout the day and just honk into!!! Well I thought it was cute in a grandpa sort of way to see that he had one, but now that I think about what I'd actually be carrying around in my pocket in quantities, not so sure it's me.... Actually dna tests would prove it in fact IS me, or bits of, hahahaha......................... yeah.........................

I heard a story today that I thought was a bit sad in many ways. Apparently a man had gone to New York City whether to visit or move, not sure, and he got lost. Having not been to the city before and hearing from people that he knew that New Yorkers were unfriendly and even brash if asked anything, he didn't ask for help. He ended up wandering the streets for five days in the cold. Finally on the fifth day someone saw him and asked if he was ok and ended up feeding him and giving him water. A New Yorker being helpful. I admit New York seems intimidating given how big it is, but I think in any city there are those that would help and those that would want to kick your ass for so much as breathing in their direction. His experience was unfortunate and thankfully he's ok.

SCREEEEEEE!!!

Now I know where they get the sound effects for movie monsters or dinosaurs! Cutting metal!! The sounds of metal being cut is tense! Most of what we do can be done by non bladed machines. The metal is cut out by a plasma machine, then bent, folded and otherwise manipulated by various other machines that don't usually require cutting it down any further. Last week Kirby and I were hard at work when the worst nails across chalk board sound came from the back of the shop. The first thing I thought of was the T Rex running after Ellie, Malcolm and Robert on Jurassic Park. The part where he get's really close to the jeep and opens his mouth up really wide and roars at them. After a few minutes of images of a T-Rex tearing through the shop going through my head, it suddenly changed. In it's place was a gigantic drill going to town on some poor souls teeth. That made me cringe. For I had a dental appointment only a few days later (which by the way I got through with flying colours, and the terms root and canal never came up!!). So there I was trying to make duct with images of teeth, slobber, and a large drill going through my mind. I was glad when break came along and I could then stare down at my sugar coated muffin.... Survived my first night of class. Am taking basic math, which is rather mickey mouse. Apparently hilariously so, because there are to BOYS, in the class that decided giggling and whispering their way through the evening was the way to go. 11 people were signed up for the class, only 6 including myself showed up that evening. We're off to a great start! Oh and if they giggle next week, I'll be sure to bring some lego or army men and see if they want to play too!!! That or suggest they get a bigger bong, that way they'll be so far beyond giggling it won't disrupt class. Ohhhh Liz is getting tempermental! Well I'm not at the point of cursing and kicking unco-operative duct work around yet. I just get it done, place it on the pile where I won't see it for the rest of the day and occasionally glare in the general direction of that job. I do however do a little dance when one of my fingers get's too close to the hammer. The worst thing I find however is vibrations. I'm not sure if it's the metal causing vibrations, but when I hit the duct and the vibrations hit one of my nerves just right, it's worse than the funny bone!

Running off on a tangent now, taking Monday evening classes gives me the perfect opportunity to visit my dad. He teaches in the Tech wing and finishes up at 5, so we can have a nice sit down and catch up. I don't think I've seen him since early summer late spring. So hopefully we'll have a lot to talk about.

Ok you know Dusty. The cat of many talents. Well I've discovered that he apparently knows when we come home. My daughter told me yesterday that as soon as I start to open the door to the building we live in, he get's up from where ever he is and runs to meet me. I had actually been wondering how my daughter knew it was me, since she always seemed to be right there when I walked in. I guess Dusty is the reason behind that. She follows his que's. I had actually heard of that ability in dogs, but had never heard it about cats. I'm certainly glad that he has talents that serve him well, and that aren't disruptful to the homestead. There are some evil felines out in the world.