Anger Management

I think there comes a time when everyone has these little revelations. They suddenly see something about themselves that either they want to eradicate because they've suddenly realized how abhorrent a trait it was, or they want to emphasize it more because it is something that could be that much more delightful. You see the situation for what it has always been, even if it didn't seem that way to you at the time. You come to the point where you either have to change it, or it will drive you nuts.
I’ve come to realize through many blatant attempts by others to make obvious, that I have an anger issue. The funny thing about that is when I was growing up I was probably one of the most patient people out there. There was not a lot that could really piss me off. Although I’m sure if you asked my mom she'd comment on how "quiet" I’d get even when things were tense. These days it doesn't seem to take much too really set me off. For instance, this evening I threw a load of laundry into the wash and proceeded to forget about it. When I remembered it was there and went to check on it, it had been removed from the wash and placed on the dryer. There was a new load both in the dryer and in the wash. I was seriously bent out of shape over that. a) reasonably so, I was angry with myself for forgetting my wash in the first place, and b) unreasonably, I was pissed that someone took my clothes out of the wash and when I missed the opportunity to slide my clothes in after their first load was done, but before the second made it into the dryer I was livid. Does it make sense? I don't think so. This evening my daughter told me that I’m scary when I get angry. I had no idea that others felt that way. Now mind you I’m not always angry and when it comes to certain things I am still very patient, but underneath all that there is this hot coal that won't go out. The thing that really got me thinking about it though is I see it in my daughter. The other day she got angry at me for something and I thought it was trivial to get so upset over something like that. Then a few days later I did the exact same thing to Bek. In all honesty it worries me to think I am passing something like that on to my daughter. She doesn't need to start off life with that attitude and I don't think it is really fare to her. This is the point where it has to either change, or drive me nuts. There of course are things I get upset about and I have a solid basis for those feelings, but it's these quick snippets that I need to curb and get under control.
ahhh to be human....

Pan's Labyrinth

Watching Pan's Labyrinth has brought back all my feelings on how affective foreign films are. With my interests leaning far more to the fantasy side, I wasn't sure how I'd feel about the movie having so much reality in it. Of course the story wouldn't have been a story at all without it, and I loved how well they blended fantasy with reality while at the same time managing to keep them in their seperate worlds. I personally find foreign films are a lot more emotional. There is a feeling of gritty reality that pulls you into the story more. There aren't a lot of cliche's and they seem so much more fresh. This movie being no exception. I was sympathizing with the girl from the start and rooting for her to get out of the reality she was living and find her dream. Definitely a movie for my collection!!

Official YET?!?

TAMMIE AND SIERRA
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I've finally finished my probation and I still have my job (guess they really DO like me... ). As of Monday January 23rd I have been an employee of the sheet metal workers union for 3 months. More specifically Dilfo Mechanical, and I hope I stay with them throughout my apprenticeship. I am now awaiting the MCA to get a hold of me so that we can get this business of a contract over with. Then I'll officially be an apprentice! Now honestly did you think I'd make it this far? I should watch what I say though. Might jinx myself in some way....

bek is moving into the building tomorrow. Am looking forward to having a friend close by. Back in 1999 I lived in the same building as a friend as well and we survived it. We both then and now are/where single mom's so there are a lot of things we can do to help each other out when so close. On the same note, we DO have a floor and two dead bolt doors between us if we feel we need them, lol. Also next September Tammie will have a little companion to go to school with. I'm sure Sierra will love having Tammie by her side more.

My brother was in a car accident last weekend. I believe they hit black ice and ended up totalling the truck they were in. He was wearing his seatbelt and his friend was not. They both walked away from the accident physically sound, but badly shaken up. Having something like that happen gives you a different perspective on life. I'm thankful my brother is here to tell the tale.

Wonder Woman!!!!

Ok so it turns out I'm not the powerhouse I thought I was. I am however quite confident that in no time I will reach maximum overdrive and get my superhero status and begin saving the world, one commercial building at a time. I went out to site last week and we had to unload a truck full of garbage shoots. They were in pieces between 4' and I'd say 10'. I helped get the first piece off the truck and went to grab it to carry it to the designated spot and realized I didn't have a good hold on it for the terrain we were about to traverse. So I put my end down to regrab and ended up unknowingly passing the piece on to Carl. Mario and Carl picked the piece up like tissue paper and off they went. Ok that is an exaggeration on my part, but compared to how useless I felt at that moment it very well should have been tissue paper in my mind. So on the way back to the shop I thought about how much further in body strength I really need to go. It was an awakening. THAT'S IT I QUIT!!!!

Ha, almost got you didn't I? Well you don't get rid of me that easily. All it means is... I've now had the heads up on part of what I have to look forward to and will have the opportunitly now to prepare for it. ie gain some serious muscle mass!! (and no, not like in the pic....... lol)

So I was going through the day with different things on my mind. I had at this point been left on my own for well over an hour to finish up the insulating I was doing. As I was going through calculations in my mind, I started thinking about different things and once again caught myself singing a phrase of a song out loud like a broken record. Believe me, I'm not the only broken record in that shop! I am however the only one who doesn't tend to sing at the top of my lungs.... So there I was singing the same verse over and then I started talking to myself about the calculations I was doing. Always easier to think out loud I say. 7 duct, 2 pieces per duct, 46" in height, and 10"x14" in length and width..... so I need 14 pieces cut on the 47" insulation... blah blah blah.... man is it hot in here... blah blah blah... wow does Mike ever mutter a lot to himself when he's working.... blah blah blah.... glad I'm not a mutterer.... (lol)

Claude is very good to me. When he is doing something new, he takes the time to show me what it is he's doing and what the end product will be used for. Of course sometimes when he's explaining these things he goes off into calculations I have yet to understand, but I am patient and just very glad that he is taking the time to inform me. It's always good to have someone take a true interest in your learning process.

As I finished up the insulation I realized I must have gone through a quarter of a roll of toilette paper. Insulation makes my nose go nuts. What I need is a hanky. Like the one my grandpa Maloney used to carry around in his back pocket. Some dark coloured bandanna that I can pull out throughout the day and just honk into!!! Well I thought it was cute in a grandpa sort of way to see that he had one, but now that I think about what I'd actually be carrying around in my pocket in quantities, not so sure it's me.... Actually dna tests would prove it in fact IS me, or bits of, hahahaha......................... yeah.........................

I heard a story today that I thought was a bit sad in many ways. Apparently a man had gone to New York City whether to visit or move, not sure, and he got lost. Having not been to the city before and hearing from people that he knew that New Yorkers were unfriendly and even brash if asked anything, he didn't ask for help. He ended up wandering the streets for five days in the cold. Finally on the fifth day someone saw him and asked if he was ok and ended up feeding him and giving him water. A New Yorker being helpful. I admit New York seems intimidating given how big it is, but I think in any city there are those that would help and those that would want to kick your ass for so much as breathing in their direction. His experience was unfortunate and thankfully he's ok.

SCREEEEEEE!!!

Now I know where they get the sound effects for movie monsters or dinosaurs! Cutting metal!! The sounds of metal being cut is tense! Most of what we do can be done by non bladed machines. The metal is cut out by a plasma machine, then bent, folded and otherwise manipulated by various other machines that don't usually require cutting it down any further. Last week Kirby and I were hard at work when the worst nails across chalk board sound came from the back of the shop. The first thing I thought of was the T Rex running after Ellie, Malcolm and Robert on Jurassic Park. The part where he get's really close to the jeep and opens his mouth up really wide and roars at them. After a few minutes of images of a T-Rex tearing through the shop going through my head, it suddenly changed. In it's place was a gigantic drill going to town on some poor souls teeth. That made me cringe. For I had a dental appointment only a few days later (which by the way I got through with flying colours, and the terms root and canal never came up!!). So there I was trying to make duct with images of teeth, slobber, and a large drill going through my mind. I was glad when break came along and I could then stare down at my sugar coated muffin.... Survived my first night of class. Am taking basic math, which is rather mickey mouse. Apparently hilariously so, because there are to BOYS, in the class that decided giggling and whispering their way through the evening was the way to go. 11 people were signed up for the class, only 6 including myself showed up that evening. We're off to a great start! Oh and if they giggle next week, I'll be sure to bring some lego or army men and see if they want to play too!!! That or suggest they get a bigger bong, that way they'll be so far beyond giggling it won't disrupt class. Ohhhh Liz is getting tempermental! Well I'm not at the point of cursing and kicking unco-operative duct work around yet. I just get it done, place it on the pile where I won't see it for the rest of the day and occasionally glare in the general direction of that job. I do however do a little dance when one of my fingers get's too close to the hammer. The worst thing I find however is vibrations. I'm not sure if it's the metal causing vibrations, but when I hit the duct and the vibrations hit one of my nerves just right, it's worse than the funny bone!

Running off on a tangent now, taking Monday evening classes gives me the perfect opportunity to visit my dad. He teaches in the Tech wing and finishes up at 5, so we can have a nice sit down and catch up. I don't think I've seen him since early summer late spring. So hopefully we'll have a lot to talk about.

Ok you know Dusty. The cat of many talents. Well I've discovered that he apparently knows when we come home. My daughter told me yesterday that as soon as I start to open the door to the building we live in, he get's up from where ever he is and runs to meet me. I had actually been wondering how my daughter knew it was me, since she always seemed to be right there when I walked in. I guess Dusty is the reason behind that. She follows his que's. I had actually heard of that ability in dogs, but had never heard it about cats. I'm certainly glad that he has talents that serve him well, and that aren't disruptful to the homestead. There are some evil felines out in the world.

Tiss the Season

When I first decided to get into the trades, I really wasn't sure where it would take me, or how much I would get out of it. Once I actually started work and realized the general simplicity of it, I wondered if it would keep my interest. Generally we fabricate and install ventilation in commercial buildings. Specifically however there is a LOT more involved in what we do. To create the simple rectangular piece of duct work that you see, there is a lot of planning, mapping, and precision involved to come to that end result. It is all that is involved in the making of such material that is keeping my interest. I believe I will be starting school in January and there is a strong possibility that it will be drafting. I'm stoked! Another thing that I have discovered however is that with all the knowledge that I will obtain over the years, I will be able to create things of mine own. My friend Andrew has put together an AWESOME pontoon boat with his skill, so in as much as our aim at work is ventilation, the knowledge can take us anywhere we wish. I do believe however that my mind does work a bit overtime with creativity. I find myself thinking up different things that I could do up on my own with the right materials. However, I do not have all the skills yet to put some of these dreams together, so I find that they can be a bit unrealistic. For instance... I have yet to own a cat carrier case that can in fact carry securely a scared adult cat. Most carrier cases out there are made of plastic with plastic joints and secured together with plastic pins. Any cat that is terrified of the great outdoors and then placed in a small space to be dragged out into this great space would be doing anything in their power to escape, and I'm telling you from experience, plastic is not the answer!! Thank goodness Tom knew his way home and traffic was not his enemy that day!! In one of my pre sleep day dreams (eve dreams?) I had invisioned a cat carrier case made out of sheet metal!! Now the fact that metal is so much more solid than plastic has it's advantages, but then again... metal is so much more HEAVIER!! So how much of the carrier could realistically be made of metal, though let me tell you, the image in my mind was fabulous!! So there is my crazy mix of what I see in my future and the lack of what I know!

I'd like to say Merry X-mas (or is it Y-mas? lol) to everyone out there! Hope your stockings aren't too stained from that lump of coal! jokes!! Take it easy (and I can say that now that I actually have a holiday free from on call work!) and drive safe!!!!!!

A Bit of X-mas Cheer!

Safety first... that is a common phrase that makes it's way around work... and for a very good reason as well. I've used just about all the machines at work now. I know what they are capable of both progressively and regressively. Claude told me the tale of how he blinked and his pinky ended up between the rollers. He didn't forget to give me the details on how his finger exploded. Couldn't eat dinner that night! Safety is VERY important when it comes to your environment. Kirby and I may be old friends by now, but there will never come a time that I won't respect every aspect of what I do.

Every day at work I do things that of course use muscle. I was thinking the other day as I struggled with my snips, that though you may be using a certain part of your body, the dominoe of muscles through out your body that you use is a lot more complicated than it may originally seem. For instance... I was trying to cut through four layers of 26 gauge metal, and I realized my hands where not strong enough to work the snips through the metal. Mario comes along and chomp! chomp! there goes the extra metal like tissue paper. I was thinking of ways to work the muscles in my hands so that there will come a time that I too can do just that. In thinking of my hand muscles I also started thinking of all the other mucles that I am using that would need strengthening to get through that metal. Arm muscles, shoulder muscles... possibly facial muscles do to all the faces I was making whilst struggling with the job...

Our X-mas party was last night. I am getting to know the people in the shop well enough, but there are still so many more faces that I have yet to put a name to. I made the decision to go with a friend and his wife. Then I would have another female to talk to if I couldn't get any conversation going with the co-workers. She it turns out was thinking the same thing. So I had a few weeks to try and figure out what I was going to wear to this shin dig. As grundgy as I get during a typical work day, I thought it would be good to show the world that I am in fact female. So I had ideas brewing in my head as to what to wear, how to do make up (yikes, what is THAT!) and so on and so forth. I thought of wearing a skirt, but then on closer inspection of my legs one night in the shower, I realized that work is definitely harder not only on my hands, but my shins as well. Skirt was out! With the help of my mum, I finally got and ensemble together and then the creator opened it's doors and let in a bit of freezing rain!! Freezing rain cancelled my friends care giver, which cancelled him and his wife from going which cancelled me going. So I didn't make it to my first work party. Next year... (and yes, it was MY choice not to go alone)

Well now.... Dusty (our cat) definitely has some interesting habits. If you recall I mention some posts ago that he tends to go around leaving doors open. Well we also have box's placed around the apartment for his sleeping pleasure. As soon as a box comes into the home, he is all over it! Well actually IN it. So now he has an old box that he started sleeping in back when we first got him (which he barely fits anymore...) a new bigger box with a sleeping matt mum bought for him in it, and a box at the end of the hall that he likes to trip you to get into whenever you show an interest in heading in that direction. If your not careful, you'll get clipped by a paw as he spies you over the edge of one of his trenches. Dusty has introduced himself to new people by standing up on his hind legs to get a better sniff of you. Most interesting however is the fact that he can now turn on the bathroom tub tap to get a drink. As soon as the shower goes on he is right there. He far prefers running water to the stagnant liquid in his bowl, no matter how often it is renewed. He went so far one evening as to hop in the shower with my daughter and wait patiently for her to finish up so he could get his ever important drink. Well this evening he took the next step and got the tap going by himself. I do hope I don't come home one day to find him having ordered cable and flipping through the nature channels while enjoying a tray of choice imported cheeses!!